Pfft.

Lack of exposure,

lack of experience,

lack of knowledge,

and

paranoid.

What a COMBO.

XOXO

Random dream.

So I slept after Azan Asar, without performing Asar prayer, I decided to take a nap first, bad habit ey?

Then I dreamt about you. I forgot the main story-line, but I remembered, when you and me try to find a place, where it supposed to be located just by the next building, to find a place for a friend who got lost. Then, we couldn't find it, we got lost either, but we're having fun together. The first time you reached me, you went all excited and hugged me so tightly I can't breathe, but I felt the warm love flowed by your scent and your heat. And you said, "This is what I've been waiting for!", smiling and continue hugging. After we're done with the building-searching, you came to my place, and we talked, laughed and talked again. It felt so good though. So good, as if, there're nothing that burdened our mind, there's always butterflies flown around us, sunshiny all over, felt so joyous by just looking at each other's smile.....

Then I woke up, my phone rang. Pffft. And I remembered, I haven't perform Asar! And I thought, "Shit, these Satans really trying so hard to make me stay asleep and skipped my Asar. Astaghfirullah. Alhamdulillah, for bringing me back to live from this instant dead". You know, although I reaaaaallly want my dreams to become true, but I know, those dreams are just, too fancy to become reality.

PS: Huda slept over my house last weekend, see her 'review' about my family. :)

XOXO

Annoying Complaint.

Warning: This is a post about a typical student life who kept complaining about her incomplete and unsatisfied life.

The main factor that induced me to write about this, is because of my new college (hostel). First, the toilets are creepy, which makes me kinda afraid to stay up late. Second, only me and four of my friends are the only dental students in this particular block, so it's quite tedious IF we have a group discussion. Like, we have to 'work hard' and berkorban in order to accomplish those work. *YAWN* Third, the internet in my room is fecking slow! I'm pissed every night. Which, actually good, because I can spend more time studying instead of wandering around for Facebook and Blogger. But, what if I have some project to do? Isn't a-slow-internet put on more stress for me? Forth, this block is supposed to be renovated, and shouldn't be used, until it done. But, due to loads of student need a  place to stay, so they, I don't know, put on a hold (I guessed?) and let the student stay here. The good thing is, the furnitures are all new. It all came with the plastic wrap around them, and we unwrapped the plastic and voila, it's totally ours! But, they (woman from the office) promised us, by last Tuesday, the room will be completed with all the things. And yet, tomorrow is going to be the next Tuesday, and we haven't received the shoe rack and the study table. Like, whaathaa? How am I going to study? How am I going to do my daily-night routine, sitting cross-legged on the chair, colourful notes on their way to be done, soul musics kept hitting my eardrums, a cup of coffee besides my pencil case, the room filled with the aroma of the coffee.......

You don't know, how these things affect my life. I can't study like I used to (for the time being), i'm stressed out by my friends who're fully prepared to listen to next lecture, i'm so jealous and next Monday is my Progress Test and I kept complaining, "When will my study table arrived?". Sounds nothing to you, ey? I don't care, it's me, not you.

Pffft, I actually can make these things work, as in, I actually can study and move on and stop complaining. Instead go to the library, study there, or, just lie down on the room floor and study, or lie on the cozy bed, put the blankets on and make yourself warm, and study, yeah, I 'can' do that. -..-" Everyone can right?
But, due to I am hormonally-unstable and bleeding now (got what I meant, ladies?), so complaining is just the right thing to do now.
XOXO

You.

I drew you,

But, I don't have the guts to give you,

Because it's not as perfect as you.

XOXO

New Semester.

For the first week, I think i'm doing great. I'm staying in the new block, as in different room now. It's an old building. To me, it's kinda scary and the toilets are lousy. Well, apparently, I got different roomate. She's quite okay.
Oh, heck yeah, I'M IN YEAR 2! I am so proud of myself. First year thought me a lot, and change me a lot. There're pros and cons though. The obvious cons are, i'm becoming more insecure and less confident. The pros, well, I know how to study using the right way:)
Anyway, I slept the whole one-hour lecture of 'Histology Of Oral Cavity and Stomach'. I was having stomachache, and my new lecture hall is bloody hot and humid. The air-conditioner is working, but I think the last time they serviced 'em was like, 20 years ago? So, at 2-5 pm everyday, we became all lazy, messy and sleepy. Duh, I hardly focus in class during that time. Sucks ey?

Fun fact for 1st week: Me and Ummi, will perform Joget Pahang for Raya celebration in faculty tomorrow! Haha! The worst part is, we're informed by the matron to do a performance, just yesterday. And, we worked our ass off today and InsyaAllah tonight, to make sure our performance would be great and not as lame as some stranger thought it might be. Gaaaaah! Wish me luck:)

PS: I love making myself busy, so that I can ignore the most fucked-up things happened to me.
XOXO

WTFeck.

"I think, you just replaced me without you realizing it. Thank you."

PS: Actually, I wanna make this as my Facebook status, but I just think it's too cheesy. Thus, I post it here, so that's why it's short.
XOXO

Anger.

Throw a fake smile to them, and drove away. Turn on the radio, Moves Like Jagger hit my eardrum. I increased the volume until my ears can't hear the sound of roaring engine whenever I dropped the gear or stepped on the throttle. It felt damn good. When the roads are clear, I'll step on it honey, hell yeah! Speeds until you felt satisfied. Then, hit on the brake the deepest the brake pad can go. Urgent brake, the traffic lights changed from yellow to red. Panicking if the car exceeds the line. Then, continue to roar. Cursed those bastards that blocked my way.

XOXO

Colours are awesome.

This is the picture of my girlfie during Raya tour. All of us are gorgeous. I'm sorry, we're awesome this way :DD

I'm sorryy for being too colourful, to you, maybe.
XOXO

Greedy wishes.

I wish I can take out my brain and wash it with high concentration of negativethoughtsicide. So that I can think of all freaking positive and good thoughts. None of negative thoughts can even linger and wander inside my sanitized brain. Because once they (negative thoughts) reached/arrived my brain, the chemicals will kill or phagocytes in it's own way to destroy the thoughts.

I wish I can be perfect. But unfortunately, there're none of perfect people in this world. But, imagine if there were people who're literally perfect. I bet, they will be chosen in anything. Without realizing it, we will point to them, since they can do anything, or we, certainly will be jealous of them, because it'll always be them.

It's actually fair, that we, human in the world, are not perfect ourself. I'm grateful to be me. I love being me. But I hate the fact that i'm negative, blur and slow in anything. For those, who literally follows my blog, will realize I like to write about this bored stuff. (oh God, see that? Being negative all of a sudden.) "I have to change" repeating to myself. "I have to stop trying to be other people" moaning over and over again. "I have to stop being jealousy over something that I shouldn't be jealous of" often reminding.

Well darlings, wish all you can. Pray all you can.

I said once, "Life ain't complicated. It's just human who are greedy and stupid". Sometimes I thought the statement can be applied, and sometimes I thought, it just can't. Why? Human aren't greedy. Human wants to try everything, and experienced it all. Can it be categorized as greedy? Well, I heard this many times, "Human can never satisfies in anything they had". I confused, whether human are built to be greedy, or human aren't greedy, but God gave us this kinda 'way' to try anything as long as we are still alive?

There's one time, I wanna go to both (A and B) event held on the same day. I was busy planning and managing my time, arranging, and grouching here and there because I was all puzzled, and lastly I asked Memmo's and H's opinion. Then they both said the same thing, "You have no choice, but have to choose only one". But I wanna go to A, because I wanna meet some of two-years-long-lost friends and I also wanna go to B, because if I didn't go, my Eid this year with family will be less meaningful to me. So, how about this situation? Am I greedy?

XOXO

This is just me.

I am so realistic and logical and some say, lurus bendul. Or, my imagination skills are so low, or I can't accept ridiculous stuffs, ugh I don't know, what's the exact word for this?

* * * * *

Okay, a few days ago, I played 'sep-sep' (those high-10 repeated times) with my lil sister. The song goes like this,

"Malam yang sepi-pi-pi,
Pak Mat jual topi-pi-pi,
Topi yang koyak-yak-yak,
Pak Mat jual tempoyak-yak-yak,
Tempoyak yang basi-si-si,
Pak Mat jual nasi-si-si-si,
Nasi yang enak-nak-nak,
Pak Mat jual anak-nak-nak,
Anak yang hilang-lang-lang,
Pak Mat jual gelang-lang-lang,
Gelang yang patah-tah-tah,
Pak Mat jual getah-tah-tah,
Getah yang putus-tus-tus,
Pak Mat jual tikus-kus-kus,
Tikus yang lari-ri-ri,
Pak Mat jual lori-ri-ri,
Lori yang bla-la-la,
Pak Mat jual bla-la-la
........
(forgotten...forgotten...and forgotten)"

Last time I played this when I was in primary school I guessed. I realized now, how absurd the song is. I think Pak Mat is soo rich and have so many ideas on what to sell. You know, selling topi, tempoyak, gelang, getah and lori are good. But, selling anak and tikus? What the heck? Is Pak Mat really own a factory who 'produce' child per day? What's inside the factory, then? Tonnes of female and male intercourse-ing? Or, there're only females whom pregnant every year? Or, there're only test tubes? Like you know, how the DNA and lab works together, then BOOM!, a kid is produced. Or, the scientist literally put sugars, spices and everything nice?

Pak Mat is selling tikus. Do you watch Ratatoiulle? How gross a rat can be? Does Pak Mat put each tikus in each cage? Pak Mat really is rich, then. Or, Pak Mat selling dead tikus? Ooh myy, the smells.

* * * * *

"When you talk, does it seems like he's not, even listening to the word you said?

That's okay, babe. Just tell me your problems,

I'll try my best to kiss them all away."

All I Have To Give, by Backstreet Boys

This is soo exaggerating. There are no such things as kiss your problems, then suddenly your problems are all solved. If there are people who're dumb or stupid, this line will gave them fake hopes.

Imagine this, she/he asks someone to kiss his/her problems and hoping the problems will go away. It'll ended up, disappointment all over him/her because the problems aren't going anywhere. Pity them. You know, even dumb people have feelings. 

* * * * *

Random thoughts of mine,

XOXO

Priceless Birthday Present.

These are the most priceless birthday present I had ever received. Oh, it's soo long, you'll be bored reading it. Because it's all about me. If you're in love with me, or you like me, or you wanna stalk me because you think i'm interesting and all, these link, are veery suitable source for you. Two of them knows me well. But Huda XD, she knew me for almost a year, but I appreciate this a lot a lot.

"Thank you, sweetie pies :') "

This one is from my guy BFF; Adam 

This one is from my girl BFF; Huda Che Senu 

This one is from my optimistic girlfriend; Huda XD

 I think there's another girlfriend who wanna do this for me, but she took some time because she up to something more important, which is preparing for her mid-sem examination.

All in all, thank you for those who're reading.
XOXO

Threesome.

I'm celebrating Eid'ulfitri, Independence Day and birthday for me this 31st August. Oh hey, I wish I wasn't too late to wish you a Selamat Hari Lebaran to you peeps. As usual, I am not celebrating birthday. But I have a very expensive gifts from my best friend. It's a long blog post specifically for me eh. I am glad to have friends like them. If you wanna read them, leave me a comment, I'll give you the link. I don't think you bother to read a long post about me, duh.
I'm celebrating Merdeka (Independence Day) by watching 1957: Hati Malaya on Astro Citra. The story was about how Malaysia was free from the colonization of British. It was a great story, you (people who haven't watch) should watch this movie, and know how meaningful Merdeka is.
Raya. Pfft, getting bored and bored, year by year. We usually having our 1st day of Raya in Singapore, but this year, I don't know what happen, my family decide to Raya in JB, which means, stayed at home watching TV. It was the most boring Raya ever. I don't know how to explain this, but it was bored. I was so pissed, because I know, I don't deserved this. It's disappointing. Oh, not to mention about duit raya. Makin besar, makin kurang duit adalah. 
And I got free calls for my birthday, I called some people only. I want to talk to my friends, exchanging raya stories, but they're all busy raya with family. Damn, I was fucking jealous.

PS: The drawings, I'll post when my next semester started. I know, the excitedness will be lessen. But who cares? I will make my own dateline. It'll be on Syawal. As in, by the end of Syawal, I will have 30 drawings.
XOXO